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Thread: Todays Chuckle
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11-19-2018, 09:20 PM #41
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2018 Silverado LTZ 3500HD CC LB 4X4 DRW Duramax/Allison
2019 Momentum 381M w/Full Body Paint
2016 Can Am Spyder F3 Limited Special Series
2017 Can Am Outlander 1000 XT-P
2016 Wrangler Hard Rock Unlimited
1997 Bayliner Capri 1950 affectionately named Skinnydipper
MSgt, USAF (Ret)
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12-07-2018, 11:04 AM #42
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With Apologies to Golden Haired Ladies Everywhere...
Jack, a handsome man, walked into a sports bar around 9:58 pm. He sat down next to this blonde at the bar and stared up at the TV as the 10:00 news came on. The news crew was covering a story of a man on a ledge of a large building preparing to jump.
The blonde looked at Jack and said, "Do you think he'll jump?"
Jack says, "You know what, I bet he will." The blonde replied, "Well, I bet he won't." Jack placed $30 on the bar and said, "You're on!"
Just as the blonde placed her money on the bar, the guy did a swan dive off of the building, falling to his death. The blonde was very upset and handed her $30 to Jack, saying, "Fair's fair... Here's your money."
Jack replied, "I can't take your money, I saw this earlier on the 5 o'clock news and knew he would jump."
The blonde replies, "I did too; but I didn't think he'd do it again."
Jack took the money.2018 Silverado LTZ 3500HD CC LB 4X4 DRW Duramax/Allison
2019 Momentum 381M w/Full Body Paint
2016 Can Am Spyder F3 Limited Special Series
2017 Can Am Outlander 1000 XT-P
2016 Wrangler Hard Rock Unlimited
1997 Bayliner Capri 1950 affectionately named Skinnydipper
MSgt, USAF (Ret)
[SIGPIC][/SIGPIC]
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12-07-2018, 05:29 PM #43
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Boss unit sent me this one - sorry it so small.
2018 Reflection 150 Series 220RK 5th wheel with 6K axle upgrade. B&W 25K OEM Companion, Steadyfast system, 2022 F350 SRW 6.7 King Ranch 8' bed, Trailer reverse lights, rear spare tire holder, storage tube, sumo springs, Victron MultiPlus 12/120/3000, and Solar
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12-14-2018, 10:39 AM #44
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Love is blind, marriage is 20/20 hindsight
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01-11-2019, 01:32 PM #45
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A blonde goes to a small coffee shop, buys a coffee and sits down to drink it. She looks on the side of her cup and she finds a peel-off prize. She pulls off the tab and yells,
"I WON! I WON! I WON a motor home; I WON a motor home!" The waitress runs over and says, "That's impossible. The biggest prize given away was a Yeti Tumbler!" The blonde replies, "No. I WON A motor home, I WON a motor home!" By this time the manager makes his way over to the table and says, "You couldn't possibly have won a motor home because we didn't have that as a prize!" Again the blonde says, "No, no mistake, I WON a motor home, I WON a motor home!" The blonde hands the prize ticket to the manager and he reads, "WIN A BAGEL."2018 Reflection 303 RLS
2018 Ram BigHorn 3500 CTD
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01-11-2019, 01:34 PM #46
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Marine to sailor - Navy means Never Again Volunteer yourself.
Sailor to Marine - Marine means My ****** Rides In Navy Equipment.
Buddhist monk to Hot Dog vendor: Make me one with everything.
What's the difference between roast beef and pea soup? Anyone can roast beef.
One night, I paid $20 to see Prince. But I partied like it was $19.99.
What's the best method to find out how heavy your Red Hot Chili Pepper is - give it a weigh, give it a weigh, give it a weigh now.
Whiteboards are quite remarkable.Last edited by FatTire; 01-11-2019 at 01:45 PM.
2018 Reflection 303 RLS
2018 Ram BigHorn 3500 CTD
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01-11-2019, 02:46 PM #47
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2018 Reflection 150 Series 220RK 5th wheel with 6K axle upgrade. B&W 25K OEM Companion, Steadyfast system, 2022 F350 SRW 6.7 King Ranch 8' bed, Trailer reverse lights, rear spare tire holder, storage tube, sumo springs, Victron MultiPlus 12/120/3000, and Solar
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01-11-2019, 02:49 PM #48
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A cowboy, who just moved to Montana from Texas, walks into a bar and orders three mugs of Bud.
He sits in the back of the room, drinking a sip out of each one in turn.
When he finishes them, he comes back to the bar and orders three more.
The bartender approaches and tells the cowboy,
"You know, a mug goes flat after I draw it.
It would taste better if you bought one at a time."
The cowboy replies, "Well, you see, I have two brothers.
One is in Arizona , the other is in Colorado.
When we all left our home in Texas, we promised that we'd drink this way to remember the days when we drank together.
So I'm drinking one beer for each of my brothers and one for myself."
The bartender admits that this is a nice custom, and leaves it there.
The cowboy becomes a regular in the bar, and always drinks the same way.
He orders three mugs and drinks them in turn.
One day, he comes in and only orders two mugs.
All the regulars take notice and fall silent.
When he comes back to the bar for the second round, the bartender says, "I don't want to intrude on your grief, but I wanted to offer my condolences on your loss."
The cowboy looks quite puzzled for a moment, then a light dawns in his eyes and he laughs.
"Oh, no, everybody's just fine," he explains.
"It's just that my wife and I joined the Baptist Church and I had to quit drinking."
"Hasn't affected my brothers though."
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01-11-2019, 02:56 PM #49
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The Brilliance of the Irish
as demonstrated by this text from an Irishman to his wife.....
"Mary, I am having just one more pint with the lads. If I am not home in twenty minutes, read this message again."
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01-11-2019, 03:02 PM #50
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One day a blond walks into a doctors office with both of her ears burnt. The doctor askes her what had happened. She says, "well... when I was ironing my work suit the phone rang and I mistakenly picked up the iron instead of the phone. "Well that explains one ear, but what about the other."
"The SOB called again"
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